Anyway, I fired up the old 'puter, sat down with my just perfect, cooled to the right spot, good to the last drop, bigass cup of coffee to read the news of the day, and blam!!!!!! DINO PORN. (and because I am a conserver of food and beverage, none got spit, but IT COULD HAVE...if you saw what I saw!) Yes, right there on my screen. Masquerading as Science. *yank half moon spectacles from chain adorned with cat charms, and don them* It was an article entitled, Dinosaur Sex Experts Concur That Animals Mated Front To Back, posted by Huff Post Science.
Here's the link, so you can play along at home: http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2012/07/09/dinosaur-sex_n_1659391.html?ir=Science I'll wait.
Did you do the slideshow too?????? Oh, you HAVE TO DO THE SLIDESHOW. ;)
Now honestly, I found this to be quite a well written article. No major scientific mumbo jumbo that requires a dictionary in one hand (major shout out to Kindle though for my "comes with it for free" New Oxford Dictionary!!) and a mouse, pointed at Google in the other. I also learned the word, cloaca (which is now the word of the day and if someone else says it, "scream real loud!!!")and how to perform the "cloacal kiss." Of course you do need a cloaca to do this. But it's fun knowledge for cocktail parties, I think... or Christmas dinner at your in-laws... or church board meetings... I digress.... ANYHOO, a cloaca, for those who don't have time to visit the link, is from the Latin word for sewer. And it is an all purpose anatomical hole for peeing, pooping and baby making. Apparently most, if not all, dino's had these.
And while some dino's may well have had... um, the word in our house is "peetie"...peeties, maybe even up to 12 feet (yes! feet.) long, (T-Rex...of course...well, you know what they say about dudes with short arms), apparently, they procreated by rubbing cloacas. Good to know, eh?
Well, the article goes on to explicitly describe how a dino lover must take care not impale or be impaled by spines, horns, other bony appendages and whatnot, not to mention be able to maneuver effectively due to their large size. All well and good. Things one should probably consider in contemplating prehistoric nature... I especially liked the quote from Dr. Gregory M. Erickson, an evolutionary biologist at Florida State University,who said, "It must have been a hell of a thing to see." ...(INDEED!!) ...and then, naturally, there was the slideshow.
But the opening sentences: "Ever think about dinosaur sex? Paleontologists do...", got me thinking about Ross Geller on Friends, which of course made me giggle, and then it really had me at "cloacal kiss." So by the time my tweener daughters found me, the giggling had manifested to full on laughter. Of course this led to them reading the article, and subsequently (because inquiring minds wanna know, right?) to viewing the slideshow.
Which only raised more questions than it answered.
- How do they know dino's didn't use their peeties?
- Did you know that penguins use their cloacas too?
- So, I have this book, it's about sea horses, it says the mama sea horse lays eggs in the daddy's pouch and he hatches them. Does she ejaculate them? Does he ejaculate in her first so she lays fertilized eggs, or are there sperms in his pouch?
- Omigod, isn't that the same artist who did the paintings in the Indianapolis Children's Museum? Wow he does porn too??????
BTW, no, it is not the same artist... there are actually several who have exhibits in the museum....here's a link: http://www.childrensmuseum.org/themuseum/dinosphere/virtual_tour/gallery/gallery.html
Which seriously does beg the question as to just why there are so many dino artists out there... Then again, Dino sex is apparently big news.
