WHAT DO YOU DO WHEN YOU FEEL THIS WAY?

Sometimes, you just feel like THIS (Surf's Up trailer).

I do anyway.

You're pearling! (That's actually not in the trailer, but Big Z says it to Cody as he's "tirelessly" rewriting practicing.)

Yep, story of my life.

Today, I'm ripping through my current manuscript, trying to make a go of it. I have stop and think to myself, why am I doing this?!

They aren't kidding, Young Lovers when they talk about being bitten by the writing bug. You are infected! It's almost like you want to suffer.

It feels like LADY GA-GA'S BAD ROMANCE.


So what do you do when you just have to do something even when it threatens to overtake you like a big ole wave??????????

Let me know in the comments?

As an advance thanks for your help, I'm going to share this wicked awesome new work my girlLovey, Astral Faery, has designed for my Social Media Sharing Pleasure.... shhhhhhh... don't tell her I showed you yet, because it's not completely finished, but I'm sooooooooo excited, I just have to do it!

Isn't it prittah? She's doing a series of piccies themed around THE UNICORN PRINCESS!!!

Oh, I just love her!!

So there. Don't we all feel better now? ;)


                                       <3FROM ME2U, LOVE, RALEY BLUE<3

On Senior Circles and the Perks of Being a Former Wallflower

Have you ever heard THIS song before, Young Lovers?

So. SonnyBlue had his first experience with a Senior circle this past weekend as he performed in and closed down the last high school play of the season. He's made a lot of great new friends his Freshman year, many of them Seniors, and it's going to be tough saying goodbye. Since he's old enough to read MommaBlue's bloggy, I will not humiliate him with details, but I bring it up because his rehash with us in the car later brought back the memories. Theatre students probably have the most emotional Senior Circles in the world. At least that was my experience.

Coincidentally, I finally got around to finishing the book, The Perks of Being a Wallflower, so I could finally watch the movie. I have to tell you I was excited about the movie when I first saw the trailer while waiting for BreakingDawnONE to appear on the screen. I didn't realize there was a book until my SisTheLibrarian started talking about it last fall. She told me to order it for myself at Chrimbo. Which I did. But reading time was scarce. In the time since though, I have been surprised how many of you have chastised me for not having read it. ( *cough* Toko.) And how many of you have mentioned how much you loooved the film. And then others of you were all like, "Omigod, there's a movie, I loved the book!" Yes, indeed, how did I miss this cultural phenomenon?

Well, I'll tell you exactly how. I was became Senior, myself, in hell high school in 1992. And by 1999, when  the book came out, I was busy with newborn KatBlue and two-year-old SonnyBlue. Life intervened. I was beyond that particular chapter, for the time being, and wasn't in a place to revisit it. (Read: not much leisure time for reading. Period.)

So wow, yeah, it was quite a story. I have to tell you, this is one case where I think I liked the movie better. The book, I'm very sorry to say, left me feeling hopeless. Maybe it's because I'm reading it as an adult and I just "know better" if you know what I mean? Older, wiser... that sort of thing? I don't mean to sound a thousand years old, but those first twenty years of adulthood are fast. And important. And stressful. And miraculous. And tragic. Your heart learns a lot.

I felt the film ended on a much more hopeful note. And of course there's always hope, Young Lovers. Of course there is. It was just conveyed better in the film for me. Although, I did have to question the David Bowie song, HEROES, as being THE tunnel song. Don't really remember that being THE song of the time. It was always cool, granted, but THE song of the times? Not that I remember. But then I did a little WIKI-ing. And. Ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh. I see now. (All About Aurelia fun fact: David Bowie has the same birthday as me. ;) )

I do also want to add some thoughts about the film that I found inaccurate, and not at all representative of the time, though. For one, in the book, Candace and her boyfriend have a much more dramatic story line. And even though she does break up with him, she does not go stag to the prom. Yes, girls were starting to do this in the 90's, but it wasn't typical. Typically, the girl had moved on to another guy, as she does in the book version. Also, in the book, the "Nothing" episode is waaaaaaaaay different. It's not the shop teacher antagonizing Patrick. Teach actually finds the impersonation amusing. Which is very true to the time period. I have to say that for reasons of adding dramatic tension and streamlining the story for film, I did enjoy the updated plotting though. Especially, the bit about "back in 'Nam." Dear God, Young Lovers, did they ever do that to us! It is soooooooo real. Not to be disrespectful of those who served. Just sayin'. (On the flipside, Mr. Anderson is married and not living with his girlfriend and telling Charlie to call him Bill? What's up with that sanitizing?)

I do not know any more about author, Stephen Chbosky than what I read on the inside of the jacket flap. (Ooh. I did like Jericho...."Nuts.") So, I cannot speak to what he was thinking in his revisions as he wrote the screenplay. As an author writing about something so sensitive as growing up, and trying to tell the story well, I'm guessing it's pretty great to be able to revisit something you wrote nearly two decades ago and be able to tell it differently, if not better. And I think it was better. And that just might be the whole point.

I mean, you will never ever forget those days. YA authors, I think, may even be stuck in them forever on some level. ONE FRIEND, TWO LOVES, AND A GUY BEARING FLOWERS, anyone? ;) You will always remember that first time you felt infinite. There will probably be a song to go with it.

(There are four traffic lights on the main drag in my hometown. If you hit one green... well back in the day, anyway... you'd hit them all green. Unless there was a train just before #3. On a dare, with SomeDudeWhoManagesWalMartNowForReal, I rode in the passenger seat of his pick-up truck to Aerosmith's LIVIN' ON THE EDGE, with, literally, my top down, and part of him equally exposed. And it was glorious. Freeing. One of The Best moments of my young life. Right up until we hit that train crossing. And there was a train. And in the next car over, there was my SuperCrushSk8terBoi... LOL... sometimes you just gotta shrug and smile, Young Lovers, especially if that's all you happen to be wearing. ;) )

You will also never forget those Seniors who make those first days of hell high school bearable for you. Or their pranks. (My Seniors, the ones I met Sophomore (our freshmen used to be separate in another school building) year, stole a fifteen foot tall statue named, Pancake Bob, from a local restaurant and planted him on the school lawn.)

And saying goodbye will feel like dying. But you'll also be reborn. You will find yourself, as Ponytail Derek points out in the film. And you will make memories. And you will be someone else's memories. You'll probably wax nostalgic and bore the hell out of everyone you know. And plenty more you wont know except on the page (*cough* RaleyBlue... and perhaps even better, Stephen Chbosky). Maybe it will even help someone through a tough time and give them hope. And that's the beauty of  this life.

Best wishes, to all the Young Lovers who are moving on to the next chapter of their lives in the coming months. Especially those who will be graduating high school and bursting forth into adulthood. Welcome to the WORLD!!

And just because it's my blog, and I'm feeling sentimental... a big shout out to my friend, IndySchoolBoy, with whom I had my own "living room routine"... STAGE KISS!!!!!!!!


                                   <3With Love, From Me2U, Love, Raley Blue<3

ASK RALEY EXPLAINS THE TWO YEARS SHE "WENT COUNTRY"

Omigod! Omigod! OMIGOD!!!!!!! YOU ASKED RALEY!!!!!!!!!! HAPPY!! SO HAPPY!!

 Yes, I DO get very excited when you write to ASK RALEY by emailing me at "me2uluvraleyblu (at) gmail (dot) com" with ASK RALEY in the subject line. (a little shameless promotion there, for your reading pleasure ;) And remember, you can ask anything.) Today's question is from Young Lover, "Markus." He writes:

Hey Raley,

What's the deal with you always referencing the two years you went country in the 90's? I love country music. Why did you only stay for two years?

Markus


Well, first a little sound tracking prep ALAN JACKSON'S "GONE COUNTRY"... 

Hi, Markus!

As you can tell by the lyrics of this particular song, it was a very popular thing to do in the latter 90's. Western themed clothing was popular, and fancy boots were easy to find. Especially where I was living in the Midwest. (I had a really cute pair with silver toes. They hurt like a b----, but I digress). So that was part of it, I suppose. Although, I've really never been much of a little joiner.

The real deal is that my parents were, shall we say, very protective, and didn't let me listen to any of the popular, a.k.a rock, music of the 80's and 90's. (I know right?! Tres tragique.) As I've probably told you before, I was allowed to listen to the local Oldies station, and their old albums all I wanted. We had a good station where we lived in my late teens.

My early years though, were spent further south, and there was nothing but country and gospel music and this delightful little show called Hee Haw, which, if you are unfamiliar, you can CHECK HERE...

So this is sorta what life was like for me. I even had a pair of special Hee Haw overalls my parents ordered for me from the show. Hee Haw is also where I fell in love with Dolly Parton when she sang THIS... (True story: I have only ever seen one live concert and it was Dolly in 1980. I was five.) I loved Dolly so much that when I watched her own show and she would sing I WILL ALWAYS LOVE YOU ,  I would cry and cry because I didn't want it to end. My MomMom was so touched by this, she made me a little butterfly that she'd drawn with magic marker on the back of the cardboard Lipton tea box. Then she snuck behind the television and tossed it to me so I'd think, Dolly herself had sent it out of the glowbox just for me. I was thrilled beyond belief. (We then marvelled at how smart Dolly was to reuse the tea box. My MomMom is one smart gal when it comes to teachable moments.)

So, to answer the question about the "two years," I guess maybe I've always been a little bit country. Even though I grew up to be a LOT rock 'n' roll. (sorry, no Donny and Marie clip... I'm just not THAT into it, lol) The main reason may be because I commuted one hundred and two miles a day to and from nursing school for two years in the mid ninety's. As luck would have it, the Oldies station didn't transmit that far. But many, many country stations did. A dvd player was still pretty unheard of in a vehicle of any sort. You could buy them and and hook them into the cigarette lighter, but they usually drained your battery. A cassette player was a luxury in newer cars. I drove my dad's old '84 Ford pickup. It had an 8track player. I didn't have any 8tracks. So I went country.

I listened to the music.

My favorites playlist if you're curious or feeling nostalgic:

MAYBE IT WAS MEMPHIS ~Pam Tillis
BOOT SCOOTIN' BOOGIE ~Brooks and Dunn
TIME MARCHES ON ~Tracy Lawrence
FAST AS YOU ~Dwight Yoakam
EVERY LITTLE THING ~Carlene Carter
GO REST HIGH ON THAT MOUNTAIN ~Vince Gill
MERCURY BLUES ~Alan Jackson
BOOGIE WOOGIE CHOO CHOO TRAIN ~The Tractors
T-R-O-U-B-L-E ~Travis Tritt
AIN'T GOIN' DOWN ~ Garth Brooks
ROCK MY WORLD ~Brooks and Dunn

(I'm guessing you're seeing some themes here... and the more you get to know me, the more you'll see them, lol.)

And I dressed the part. I had lacy thigh high stockings under my uniform and wore my cute little boots to the hospital. That is until I got busted by the head nurse.

I learned all the line dances. They were pretty epic. (*snort* At the time.)

I was having fun. I had a job. I was working on a degree. I was making my own money. I got married. I L<3VED driving when I was young. I absolutely loved driving, Young Lovers. I'd say those two years of my young adulthood were the most wild and carefree of my life. I had one hell of a good time.

But then reality started slipping into the cracks. My parents split up, and with them, my entire close knit family. (My mom's little sister and my dad's late little sister had been best friends growing up.) I got my degree, but found out nursing wasn't for me. I was struggling with infertility at just twenty years old.

I started writing poetry again, like I had in high school, to get all the feelings out. But I longed for a type of music that reflected just who I was. I was bright and shiny on the outside. But inside, I was a dark and twisted little soul. And then one day, I heard THIS (Nirvana's Come As You Are).

And I knew I'd found my sound.

The Grunge, Alternative and Indie Rock movement were not only unfolding in proverbial "My Time," but they were speaking to me in ways that opened up my creativity and made my mind question EVERYTHING. And they let me feel what I felt. There was no more need to always be ribbons and curls, but there was no stigma against it either. In fact, with long haired guys in vogue again (Axl was gorgeous with long hair. Natural curls to his butt. Fabio had nuttin' on him.) and stripes of colored dye (think Goth and Emo) dark nail polish, self expression had never been more real.

The advent of Ska just made this even better. Throw back to Madonna, flash forward to Anime. It was as if the me that missed the entire rock movement of my childhood had been bridged. I burst out into the world. I dressed vibrantly or drab as I felt the moods. In whatever I wanted. I embraced not just my femininity, but my womanhood. I rocked it.

I wrote seriously. I entered that poetry in competitions and had it published in anthologies and got excited about the passion for writing I'd always had. I decided to do something about that. I took professional writing courses.

And when I eventually did have children, I rocked out with them. I vowed to bring them up by allowing them to be authentic. I don't think I was really allowed to be authentic growing up. I don't blame my parents, they did the best they could. But authenticity wasn't really encouraged among their generation. (Not all of them were hippies.) My dad echoed this one day when we were talking about the differences between Baby Boomers and Gen X-ers. He shocked the holy living sh*t out of me by saying, "I like you guys better." He was talking about my generation's way of saying, get out my way, and let me stand. I am who I am. Let me be me. I'm not you. I refuse to be you. It's not the end of the world. Far from it. We're going to do great things. And we can all be different and still embrace the same things.

In the end, Markus, for me, it was about how I connected to music and where I was in my life. I'm not dissin' on Country now. I'm just making my own sound. ;) Thanks for asking, and all the best to you as you find yours. <3 Raley

P.S. The Little Felt Shoes Contest is still on. 20$ gift card, people! Pretty please? read more here

TURN OFF THE PAVED ROAD... BE STILL WHILE THE SUN SETS

OK, I hate it too when peeps be braggin' about their fabulous vacays to WTFever... and how much fun they had...but how much money it cost or didn't cost, because frankly, not all of us can afford vacay, or time off, period... and all their corny cell-o-phone pics of them kissing on/in the beach/mountaintop/live volcanic lava flow, etc.

So I will not bore you with any of those. Mainly because I left my camera with PengBlue, so she could photograph herself being awesome next to her drawing of little red tree frogs that was made of awesome and featured in a community art show. Which, yes, we, as bad parents, missed by going on the only alone weekend we've been on in years.

(LIKE IN EIGHT YEARS. K? SO DON'T BE HATIN.'  ;) )

I did take some marvy pics on my little POS cell phone, none of which I can email to myself, now... Which is sad because we went to this little town which has the same name as B3. Yes, three American towns share his name. One in Pennsylvania, one in Cali and one in Northern Michigan. There also used to be an airport in New York, but now it's named after a dead president or something. (They are all spelled differently too, an none of them the way B3 spells his.) Anyway, I would have loved to show him "B3, Michigan." As it is, he is looking at little blobs, which are signs, on my crappy little celly screen. Oh well. But then that's kind of the point. Which I will get to later in the post.

BoyLovey and I ran away up the west coast of Lake Michigan to the teeny tiny tip of the little finger for a couple of snowy days. bL has never been up that far and I used to camp there most weekends of my teen years with my family. This is where Lani, The Unicorn Princess, was born in my mind. This is where the myth of the Unicorn met the legend of the Mermaid and caused the fairy tale to take shape.

Believe me, you don't have to go to Key West (which was lovely the one and only time I went in high school) to enjoy exotic blue water that never ends. CLICK HERE (Manitou Passage) (btw, these are all google image pages and if you wait for the whole page to load, my selected image will come up larger, so you can view it better)

There are even Islands. VIEW (North and South Manitou Islands, off Glen Arbor)

And here's my totally gratuitous "I'VE SLEPT HERE" LINK (North Manitou Island), but not this time because it was too cold for primitive camping and backpacking.

Anyhow, I wanted to show this place to bL and scout out some good places to take our kids in the summer. Turns out there's not much open this time of year, but we did eat the best soup and paninies we've ever had in Leland. The coffee was also amazing. It was like ten degrees outside, mind you. We might have passed it up if we hadn't needed a pee break and to warm up. Stone House Bread Cafe ( www.stonehousebread.com ) was DELICIOUS. And the really cool thing? Leland, MI is located just above the 45th Parallel which means it is exactly halfway between the equator and north pole.

So yeah, lunch on top of the world one day, and in the woodlands of our non typically named child by the same name, but spelled differently, the next. Pretty cool huh? Which btw, if we hadn't turned off a few paved roads "just to see..." would never have happened.

There aren't words for little things like this. It was not an expensive little trip by most standards. The bulk of it was gas and lodging. With the exception of lunch at Stone House Bread Cafe, I cooked in our condo (affordable, thanks to the off season)  and made my own sandwiches on the road. We swam in the condo complex pool and our main entertainment was the sunrise and sunset.

Now, a Lake Michigan sunset rarely disappoints...CHECK THIS... (sunset)... But Saturday night, we were treated to an amazing and completely unexpected moment. The sun up there, does this awesome thing where it drops like an egg into a boiling pot and makes a flash. This is usually seen best when there is little or no cloud cover. Saturday was very overcast. But the water got pink, the lower the sun sank behind the clouds, which also turned all sorts of orange and pink. It was pretty. But then it got awesome. The egg dropped down below the cloud bank and set the sky, the water and the snow covering the dunes in front our picture window on fire with color!! The walls in the condo glowed. And then, the most amazing thing happened. As the ball of sun sank into the water/horizon, fingers of light shot up to the sky behind a lighthouse in the harbor, making it look like nothing less than the hand of the Divine. Whether it was reaching up to the heavens or down to us, is hard to say, but it was beautiful. And sacred.

It truly is the little things in life, Young Lovers. We could have gone in the summer with all it's fishing, sailing and swimming and spent a fortune doing it. Or we could have spent the same fortune skiing, tobogganing and snow machining. But that sunset couldn't be bought. The thrill of sitting in a quiet corner that is both edge and top of the earth can't be bought. And no price will give a little boy the thrill of knowing his mom and dad turned off the main drag just to be able give him a piece of his collective world heritage.

So take time. Do the thing. Whatever it is. Grow your soul. And it will sing.

On a side note. This condo is one bL and I were checking out for a possible future home. THIS is the actual view from my picture window where I would be writing... Sooooooooo, how much work do you think I'll be able to get done from here? ;)

Oh, and confidential to my girLovey: HAPPY BIRTHDAY, BABY!! <3


                                        <3FROM ME 2U, LOVE, RALEY BLUE <3